Busy week
Sorry won't be around much this week. My husband is on holiday and we're catching up on things at home and with the family.
Saturday we tidied up my MIL's garden. It wasn't that great a day from the standpoint of her dementia, she was very quiet and her eyes were rather blank. But she got stuck into the work with us like a trooper, and seemed happy to be working along side us. It is strange to see someone you've known well for so many years just evaporate in front of your eyes.
Son's exam results were fine, just got to wait for UCAS to confirm offer/choices.
This is a big relief as his eye injury back at the turn of the year really affected him, not just in terms of the time he lost from school, but also the jolt that it gave him having to have an operation and to keep still for so long.
I'm doing a short reading with the Poetry Pamphlet group on Friday at the Edinburgh Book Festival. Feeling nervous about it, but looking forward to hearing other people's work.
I'm feeling torn about writing just now. I'm wondering if I should just stick to my photography, where at least I feel confident in the doing, if not the submitting part of it. Part of me wonders why I feel the need to keep attempting things that leave me feeling challenged but unfulfilled. N thinks it's a trait I should try and change and maybe she's right.
Anyway must dash, got a meeting on the big garden to fit in today as well.
These are three olive shells I picked up on the beach at my niece's in the USA. The shot's too dark and moody for stock, but I like it.
posted by apprentice at
9:24 am
12 Comments:
You write amazingly well Apprentice and it would be a shame not to read your poetry. You seem to do all these poetry readings and podcasts and things. I don't know, you could stop the writing, but I tend to find that the fulfillment is in the writing itself. All the rest of it means developing a tough skin and getting used to people saying NO.
Oh and I love your photos too.
I'd agree with Verilion's sentiments. A lot of people I know are very creatively driven, and if they stopped they'd keel over, I reckon. I also know quite a few people that combine arts fields very successfully.
It's not the end result, but the process I find most interesting, the composition, the messing around. I know that photography is probably just as much the same. I find with creating things, it's that they never turn out exactly as you planned, they take on a life force of their own, as though they were some spirit or force trying to get live... I'm not explaining this very well, but I think you know what I mean. Funny, I've been thinking a lot about what writing means too :)
Oh and best of luck with the readings!
Thank you both, Yes I know what you mean about the "having to/wanting to" part. That's what N questions, she's very Latin that way, much more laidback than me.
I think I'm at a stage with writing where I know I won't produce what I'd like to, and that's just frustrating.
And I'm a classic A type personality, which was something I was trying to change. And I'm always pressed for time, believe it or not. I really want a hut on a estuary, with a camera and laptop for a while.
I think you'd give up your writing for about a week ( possibly) but then be straight back.
Please write because you do it well.
Have a good family time.
Well done your son. Commiserations on your MIL. I have just taped the Paul Watson programme - it's interesting to compare sufferers with my late brother, who had the most rapid and deepest descent into oblivion in his early fifties and lasted for years. It's good to know he's free at last. Sorry that's not very cheerful. Have a good break.
I love the shell photo too. And don't I know what you mean about feeling torn between two 'mediums' creative-wise - or perhaps I mean just trying to do too many things ...
Your description of your MIL 'evaporating' really got me. Such an apt description.
At the root of most creative acts - photography, writing and the rest - is a desire to communicate with other human beings. There is nothing more important. Granted at times it's frustrating and exasperating, but the process of creating is its own reward.
Quite often, when creative people get the feelings of frustration you describe if can mean they're close to a breakthrough. So you can either put it aside for a while and see what happens when you pick it back up (like according whatever it is some kind of gestation period?) or work through it I think.
I love the shell picture too, and the darkness of it just heightens the impression of fragility and intimacy.
Oh and congrats re: your son! Capt. B's just flunked out - missed his exams, was given a second chance, then missed the resits! - so mixed feelings (sadness, worry, annoyance)... BOOO! But hey, it's his life.
Have a good time out! Soak up this sun while it lasts!
Thanks all, I think I just meant I feel a more comfortable affinity with photography, I don't question whether I'm good enough to be doing it. I do feel that way writing, all the time in fact and it's quite corrosive state of mind to get into.
Anway the reading's not till next wek, I got my dates wrong as ever. It's on Tuesday, so I'll be very well prepared as I thought it was today!
Not just me then Apprentice, remember the long round trip I made back in April a week early for a poetry slam ;)
And I forgot to say congratulations to you parents and your son - it must be a relief!
being creative is rarely confined to just one medium. Say no to the drone stuff.
Thanks lm, wish I could sat no to the drone stuff, or afford a cleaner!
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